We went cliff jumping again.
This time we decided to go big before we went home.
25-30 foot cliff. (There is HIGHER! LIKE WHAT?!)
Side note: The joke this weekend has been "You remember when our moms asked us if our friends jumped off a cliff would you too? The answer is yes."
And for me. I jumped BEFORE my friend... so I guess I am the friend in question...
ANYWAYS.
When I finally got the courage to jump (Before Sara did by the way)... It was terrifying.
You are standing on this cliff. And you look down... and far far below you is the water.
So you take a few steps back... start to go and then-
Stop.
Look again.
Take a deep breath.
Move a few steps back.
Start to go again.
Only just to stop.
I mean.
It's terrifying.
This leap.
Even though you know it's safe (because the boys went first)
There is just so much space...
And then the water.
What if I don't jump far enough?
What if the water just happens to not be deep enough?
What if I slip?
What if I land in the water wrong?
What if I can't climb the cliff face?
What if
What if
What if
Then finally.
There is someone to help.
You need that person to count.
Because you know... at the end of the count. You jump.
You just fly off the cliff top.
3... (Your mind is whirling)
2.... (You start second guessing your sanity)
1... (You stop thinking)
Step. Step. LEAP!
And you fall.
And you fall.
And you fall.
And you fall.
And you fall...
It never seems to end this drop.
It just keeps going.
You wonder if time has stopped.
Then at the last minute.
SPLASH
You hit the water.
You've done it.
But that isn't all that you need to do.
Now that you've hit the water... It's time to climb back up.
So you swim to the easiest looking rock face.
The one everyone else has been climbing.
And you look up.
It's tall.
I mean really tall.
But the person who counted for you has climbed up a little ways.
"You got this."
And holds out his hand.
You need that hand you realize.
Even though your pride makes you really not want to use it.
Then you climb this wall face.
It's like life.
You think you can do it alone.
You think you can hide all your problems.
But you can't.
First off.
God already knows what it is you are dealing with.
Second off...
Needing someone isn't bad.
It feels weird.
But it's not bad.
It just means...
That you trust this person.
More than you trust other people.
That they can help.
In a way that other people cannot.
And that is okay.
It's not a sign of weakness.
It's like the guy who counted.
I don't even know his name.
But he counted for me.
He helped me climb.
He waited until I was at the top to climb so that if I fell, he could help.
There is nothing wrong with that.
In fact.
I think it is more than okay to have someone like that in your life
Like I said it feels weird.
Pride and shame comes into play.
It tries to tell you that you can do it
Or that you aren't worth their time.
Or that they have more important things to do.
DON'T LISTEN TO THAT
So yes.
You need help.
We can't do everything ourselves.
It's literally impossible.
God puts people in our lives for a reason.
And you always have God to talk to.
You do.
He helps.
A lot.
Good night darling readers.
Sleep well.
May God give you peaceful sleep.