Here is a list of mine.
I love to be alone.
But I love to be around people.
I hate being touched.
But I love/want to cuddle.
I am a strong independent woman who needs no man.
But I want to have someone to rely on.
I love being busy.
But I hate being overworked.
I hate surprises.
But love when people do something random just out of kindness
I love travelling.
But I hate leaving.
I want an adventurous life.
But I want to stay in one place.
I love trying new things.
But I hate change.
Those are just a few I can put into words.
I am so excited to move guys. I am so excited to see what is going to happen in the rest of my life.
But.
I don't want to leave this town.
I for once feel like a part of somewhere.
I have never felt that before.
I have never really been part of a community.
And... I am scared to leave.
Just like...
I want to get married
I want to have a kid.. maybe two.
I want to live in a house with someone.
But.
I don't feel like there is someone out there for me.
The person that I have let in..
For some reason just...
Bars himself from me.
I have had this magnetic connection with one person.
And yet...
I guess I am not good enough?
Maybe I am hard to love.
Maybe I am too A-Type.
Maybe I am too emotional
Or something...
I dunno.
All I know is..
I don't.
Here is a random story today.
I was at the rock wall supervising.
And this guy I see around the gym comes up to me.
He says, "I heard about the incident with the football players."
And since I am at the rock wall I am trying to think of an incident that happened there, and was confused.
And he is still talking, "I am really sorry that happened to you. You didn't deserve that."
And I was still very confused.
Then I realize he was talking about last week.
He asks, "That was you, I assume?"
I nodded.
I was in shock.
No one had apologized that day, (except the guy my boss sneakily convinced to.)
The guy today just goes, "Yeah. I am really sorry that happened. No one, seriously, no one deserves to be treated that way."
And I all I can do is say, "Wow. Thank you." Because.. really that tiny little act of kindness... went so far.
Just.
I almost cried.
(It was a rough day, the day of the incident).
See what I mean?
I am a tough cookie, but almost CRIED when this random guy apologized out of the blue for something he was not even a part of. I mean. He came in AFTER the fact. He had nothing to do with it... and yet he is the one that apologized. It's amazing.
God is going to bless him for that.
I will think of a clever and fun way to tell you of the incident!