I was sitting in the living room
Eating peanut butter toast on fancy cinnamon bread
Drinking chocolate almond milk
Enjoying the early morning feels
Waiting for my daughter to decide to make her appearance.
Well.
That day (after a nap) I had a doctor's appointment
My husband and I get there and we were told
"Sorry. Your husband can't go in with you."
Now this is frustrating because I like having spousal support.
And he asks the questions I forget to ask.
But we understood because of the Corona Virus.
So I go in and my blood pressure (for about the 4th check up) is SUPER high. I am talking 150/98 high. Which is dangerously high.
So my nurse walks out calmly after saying "I'll be back." As soon as the door closed I heard her yelling for my OB.
At this point my husband had messaged the family group chat.
Updating them on the situation and sharing his frustrations.
I then update them that things weren't going well.
My OB walks in and says, "Looks like you are done being pregnant"
So we discuss me being induced.
We schedule it for THAT NIGHT.
So in the family group chat I say, "We're having a baby today"
I was honestly surprised that I didn't go downstairs to find a corpse that was once my husband. Although he was very pale and had a lot of nervous and excited energy.
We rush through the few last things we need to prepare for baby, we pick up snacks because we were informed he COULD come in with me, but he couldn't leave without risking not being allowed to come in. Seriously, we were so happy he could come with me. We figured out things for the dog. And we packed as we were told it could take a few days for her to come out.
We get there. And I get induced into labor.
I was in labor for a total of 45 hours.
On Thursday I was super high.
They gave me pain med as the contractions got worse.
My water broke at the same time another girl who was walking down the hall to a room's water broke right after the girl next doors baby was born right after the lady down the hall's baby was born. It was a wild night for the nurses.
Anywho.
Thursday and Friday I was drugged up.
With pain drugs and then an epidural.
My husband was a champ.
I literally could not have done it without him.
He was such great help and support.
We watched A LOT of Avatar: The Last Airbender.
When it came time to push.
It only took 30 minutes and then I was holding my baby girl.
Guys.
Word scan not express the emotions that welled up in me as they laid my daughter on my chest.
This love and amazement and awe and relief and so much more as her head cuddled into me.
I never knew I could love so deeply.
It was an amazing experience.
Now I am currently a stay at home mom and loving every minute of it.
I am soaking up the snuggles and loving her little chirps and her attempts at talking with us. (though she is only 2 weeks old.)
I adore this little human and I can't but help to think that somehow on that still calm morning, I just KNEW deep down I'd get to meet her that day.
She's going to grow up too fast.